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Juggernaut’s Super Bowl Ad

Juggernaut Pharmaceuticals is proud to introduce the newest member of the Juggernaut family during the Super Bowl: Panacea. This next generation in medication is just what the doctor ordered. Panacea is what the public wants and needs in these trying times.

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February 5, 2010 · Filed under The Ads

Stu explains more about The Missing Link

An authority on evolution

What is the MISSING LINK?

The missing link was lost over a HUNDRED YEARS AGO. Â Darwin (no one knows his last name) called it the ‘Holy Grail’ of science. Â He searched the globe for this elusive treasure which he knew would bring him fame and riches. Â He nearly found it in a cave but a GIANT BOULDER came rolling down at Â him and he barely escaped with his life. Â Even the huge bull whip he carried with him was useless against such a boulder.

Now You Know

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January 19, 2010 · Filed under Stu Cranstence

Stu and the “Missing Link”

Stu Cranstence: soon to make another major discovery?

When will scientists find the MISSING LINK?

Scientists have been trying to find the MISSING LINK for over A HUNDRED YEARS. Â It is very hard to find because it is made out of CAMOUFLAGE. Â The scientist who finally finds the MISSING LINK will become very famous and people will stop ignoring him and will ask him to do an interview on a real T.V. show. Â He will go to SCIENTIFIC CONFERENCES and no one will laugh at him. He will find the MISSING LINK inside the perimeter on his next expedition because then everyone will say he is the TOP SCIENTIST.

Now You Know!

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January 16, 2010 · Filed under Stu Cranstence

New and Improved Flextrek

The new and improved Flextrek 37,000,000,000,000 will blow you away with how convenient it is. Follow along with the patented CLIC method of adjustment. It’s so easy!

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January 8, 2010 · Filed under Flextrek 37 Trillion

World Class Athlete

Introducing Steg Prongsten, world class athlete and fitness expert. Get to know Steg……….. before it’s too late.

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January 2, 2010 · Filed under The Killer Kelp

Pandemical linked to more side effects

Thanks Juggernaut!

Since the initial release of the drug Pandemical to the general publicÂ several new side effects have been reported. The FDA has ordered Juggernaut Pharmaceuticals to release a new commercial which includes all of the newly identified side effects of the drug. Juggernaut Pharmaceuticals has complied with this request under the letter of the law and this commercial is the result. Thank you, Rootsin Toobers

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December 28, 2009 · Filed under The Ads

Lorb Lorbson in his own words

Lorb Lorbson, the man, the myth, the legend, the reality. A probing interview with Lorb where he talks about his career, his fans, and the Legendary Cheripintera.

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December 14, 2009 · Filed under Lorb Lorbson

Stu on Darwin

An authority on evolution

How did Darwin invent evolution?

Darwin (no one knows his last name) invented evolution nearly a hundred years ago. Â One day he was walking in the forest and he saw five or six figures standing in a line. Â The first one was a monkey walking on all fours. Â The next one was standing a little straighter and by the time you got to the last one it was a man standing straight up! The disgusting thing is that the man was nude! Â You couldn’t see his you know what because one leg was going forward, blocking the view. Even if you hold the page at an angle and look really close, you can’t see anything.

Then Darwin wanted to invent National Selection. Â In a very famous incident he strapped a really ugly man to a table and turned the crank so the rope would pull the table up to the ceiling. Â Then lightning struck and as they say, ‘The rest is a mystery’.

Now you know!

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November 28, 2009 · Filed under Stu Cranstence