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Posts Tagged ‘backpacking’

It Never Needs Washing!

May 28th, 2010 4 comments


The good people at Archwood want to remind you that it’s summer and you need a new piece of hiking/climbing/backpacking apparel. If you want to look like Steve Climber on the trail you’d better step up, and strap on the French Wedge! Don’t get caught looking like a fool on the trail wearing last years apparel, this unit is what everyone is wearing now.  Don’t miss out!

New and Improved Flextrek

January 8th, 2010 10 comments

The new and improved Flextrek 37,000,000,000,000 will blow you away with how convenient it is. Follow along with the patented CLIC method of adjustment. It’s so easy!

Steve Climber spotted in Ca. desert

October 27th, 2009 7 comments
Steve Climber: The outdoor's ultimate enthusiast

Steve Climber: The outdoor's ultimate enthusiast

Steve Climber was spotted in the Mojave desert recently sporting his world famous “French Wedge” hiking gear and wearing what looks like a fully loaded backpack (You may have to scroll up and down to see the entire pack). Rumor has it that Steve was working on a new ad for the good people at Archwood. Could this be a new model to replace the Flextrek 37 Trillion? Stay tuned.

The French Wedge

July 26th, 2009 5 comments

Ever wonder what Steve Climber is wearing? Now available to the public for the first time, the French Wedge. Made of a revolutionary fabric, it never needs washing! Your hair, fluids and substances actually make it stronger, binding them all together to make this the most durable and cutting edge piece of outdoor equipment ever invented. Thanks to the good people at Archwood, you too can look like Steve Climber out on the trail.

Want to look like Steve Climber on the trail?

Never needs washing!

Steve Climber: The Beginning

July 10th, 2009 1 comment

In this early footage of  Steve Climber you can follow him as he checks on things and has a bit of a problem with Uncle Jessup.  Steve  is modelling the Flextrek 37 Trillion backpack and showing off  his flashy new hiking look (featuring the “french wedge”  shorts) in this fine Archwood production.

Makes climbing easier!

July 5th, 2009 1 comment


You wouldn’t think so, but this pack actually makes climbing easier!! See for yourself in this promo video. See how it performs in high winds, wow! No wonder Steve Climber won’t hike, climb or do anything without his Flextrek 37 Trillion Gravitrex.

Anti-Gravity Backpack Technology

June 25th, 2009 5 comments

Steve Climber displays the incredible anti-gravity technology included in the groundbreaking new Flextrek pack. This pack is so advanced, even the Chinese don’t have anything that can touch it. Lean in to the new Gravitrex and let the pack do the work for you. This pack is so righteous, you’d have to be a fool not to want one.

Steve Climber checks on things

June 12th, 2009 3 comments

This is an excerpt from Steve Climbers public TV show. In this episode you can see Steve hard at work making his rounds checking on the environment to make sure everything is running smoothly. He takes notes in his little notebook so that he remembers to revisit trouble spots, like that rock high up on the cliff that he has been worried about. We’ve edited out the long lecture on non-flowering shrubs to help move it along.

Steve Climber upset about Flextrek Augmenteon ad

June 5th, 2009 1 comment

Industry insiders report tension at a meeting between Steve Climber, world renowned naturalist, and Rootsin Toobers, CEO and head of marketing at NailGun Promotions who produced this ad. Steve, who is also known as “Marathon” Climber, has a reputation for delivering long public lectures that have been described as “thorough” and “a bit dry”. He reportedly expressed discomfort  at the tone of the Flextrek 37 Trillion AUGMENTEON ad. Rootsin responded with a stream of profanity and verbal abuse and reminded Steve that he was under a lifetime contract to NailGun Promotions. Rootsin was heard repeatedly saying  “listen Climber, get with the program!” Steve reportedly left the meeting in tears.

Flextrek 37 Trillion

May 22nd, 2009 3 comments

TECR posted the following comment on the Flextrek 37 Trillion:
“You suckers, this is total crap made in China. “M-series” is a complete Arcteryx ripoff and i’m sure they’re suing. Plus, no one uses turgid spring release action anymore, please. Plus, hyperflex enforcement was tried, tested, and failed miserably by Hugh Grant with that ho. Plus, you can see very clearly in that fall that the pack is empty – bogus! Plus, I totally don’t buy his dominance of the landscape. Plus Archwood’s warranty repair is for sh*t. Plus, Steve’s lectures are a bore. Pls.”

steve1

The response from Rootsin Toobers:
To trecr, First of all, the good people at Archwood welcome your feedback and thank you for taking the time to give us your input!  Everything in your comment is wrong. All Archwood products, including the Flextrk 37 Trillion, are the best products in the world. We take pride in their quality and although it is certainly a long term goal of ours, at this time none of our products are manufactured in China. Perhaps the most erroneous of your comments is your characterization of Steve Climber’s lectures as boring. Just because they are long and people don’t stay until the end does not mean these lectures are boring.  We recently received a comment from someone who claims to have enjoyed a part of Steve’s most recent lecture. To put it simply, Steve Climber is ‘Nature’s Ultimate Enthusiast’.
Sincerely,
Rootsin Toobers
Archwood Head of Marketing