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Posts Tagged ‘archeology’

Stu Cranstence: Out in the Field Again

August 8th, 2012 No comments


Stu Cranstence puts in some long hours on his latest expedition as he seeks to uncover more amazing findings. Life on an expedition has it’s hazards, but Stu pushes on in the pursuit of REAL SCIENCE.

giant eye maggot

Stu on Mastodon Eggs

April 3rd, 2012 2 comments


Stu Cranstence answers a question about animal droppings. There is no better expert in Western America on the subject of droppings than Stu Cranstence

Viewer Discretion Strongly Advised

March 14th, 2010 11 comments

Stu Cranstence teaches the public about “Areas” and his “Findings” while bravely battling the side effects of various Juggernaut Pharmaceuticals products.

A very pointed question

February 25th, 2010 10 comments

Kate asks a very sharp pointed question of Stu Cranstence and he lobs it back over the net with ease. Here Stu shows how adept he is at debate and logic.

Stu explains more about The Missing Link

January 19th, 2010 2 comments

An authority on evolution

What is the MISSING LINK?

The missing link was lost over a HUNDRED YEARS AGO.  Darwin (no one knows his last name) called it the ‘Holy Grail’ of science.  He searched the globe for this elusive treasure which he knew would bring him fame and riches.  He nearly found it in a cave but a GIANT BOULDER came rolling down at  him and he barely escaped with his life.  Even the huge bull whip he carried with him was useless against such a boulder.

Now You Know

Stu and the “Missing Link”

January 16th, 2010 4 comments

Stu Cranstence: soon to make another major discovery?

When will scientists find the MISSING LINK?

Scientists have been trying to find the MISSING LINK for over A HUNDRED YEARS.  It is very hard to find because it is made out of CAMOUFLAGE.  The scientist who finally finds the MISSING LINK will become very famous and people will stop ignoring him and will ask him to do an interview on a real T.V. show.  He will go to SCIENTIFIC CONFERENCES and no one will laugh at him. He will find the MISSING LINK inside the perimeter on his next expedition because then everyone will say he is the TOP SCIENTIST.

Now You Know!

Stu has his findings verified

November 18th, 2009 7 comments
An authority on ancient pottery
An authority on ancient pottery
Question: Are your findings scientific?
Answer: For your information, my brother, Ron, took some of my findings (ancient pottery) to an actual university scientist who told Ron that, YES they do have a scientific name for these findings.  According to this scientist, these findings are called “droppings”.    I don’t need the establishment to tell me that my findings are legitimate  but for those doubters out there, ‘read it and weep’.  You can see me actually making these findings in a video that Ron made called,  ‘Stu Cranstence collects his findings’.
Thanks again to my brother Ron.  He enables me to do all the things I do!
Now you know!

Stu on Dislodgication

November 6th, 2009 2 comments

Stu Crastence lets us in on his secret weapon to find findings.

Proof that Stu has found Mastodon remains

October 7th, 2009 1 comment

mastadon

In an answer to his critics we here provide scientific proof of Stu Cranstence’s findings. In this screen shot from Stu’s film available for viewing here you can see clear incontrovertible evidence that Stu has found Mastodon remains. This was shot in the parking lot where a scientific conference was about to take place. Stu’s keen eye found this startling evidence of Mastodon activity. Remarkable!

Stu on Mastodons

October 5th, 2009 4 comments
An authority on Mountain Lions

An authority on Mastodons

A question I am often asked:  How are you able to find so many MASTODON bones and when will the Mastodons return?
The most effective way to find Mastodon bones is by remaining in the perimeter. When you STRAY outside the perimeter it can be hard to locate the cooler and that will become a real distraction. I would suggest looking near the car. The car tires often DISLODGE Mastodon bones in a process known as dislogication.
Mastodons have not been seen alive in West America for over a hundred years! They will most likely return when their wicked queen has been killed. What a great day it will be when the queen is finally eliminated. A great ceremony will be held and the great king will rightly take his place as the true ruler of the Mastodons.

Now you know!

Stu Cranstence collects his findings

May 12th, 2009 5 comments

Here we see ole Stu at work in the field discovering his findings. He displays his unique discovering style in action. You can see him discover a remarkable double mushroom which Stu may have misidentified, but we haven’t catalogued it yet. Isn’t it something the way he makes all those dicoveries at the end of his expedition and loads them into the vehicle? You can also see how attached Stu is to his beer cooler. He likes to reassure himself by patting it and regularly checking it’s contents to make sure he is well stocked. How remarkable to find those ancient rocks in a circular configuration! The ancient pottery he found is amazing! Why doesn’t Stu get the credit that he deserves for making such great discoveries?