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Stu collects some fresh specimens

Stu Cranstence instructs the general public on the wonders of fast growing mushrooms. He drops off some fresh specimens at his brother Ron’s house. Stu also instructs us all about Mountain Lions and their sharpened beaks.

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  1. stu cranstence
    July 25th, 2010 at 12:13 | #1

    To Old Pappy,
    You ARE confused indeed. Ive been collecting fast growing mushrooms (double AND triple) for years. If you don’t believe me, ask my brother, Ron. He houses my collection for me. Though, these mushrooms are not edible they are significant findings just as my findings of ancient pottery are significant. So significant, in fact, that an actual scientist verified that they have their own scientific name. They are called “droppings”. if you don’t believe me you can ask my brother, Ron. He also hoses my collection of “droppings” or “ancient pottery” to the layman.
    Stu Cranstence

  2. Old Pappy
    July 24th, 2010 at 10:05 | #2

    I’m a part time “outdoorsman”—sometimes I ain’t got no home to go to. I know a lot about food foraging. I’m confused. That there fast mushrooms looks like a big pile of cow shit. How do you tell the difference?Sometimes the food I eat tastes like shit. Maybe that’s what it is? Is there a tell tale smell difference?…guess that won’t help me. My sinuses are impacted.

  3. stu cranstence
    July 21st, 2010 at 09:07 | #3

    This video has a lot of good information in it but some key scientific facts were left out. There is no mention of BONE STICKS. Bone sticks are sticks that are so old that they have turned to bones that are sticks but they are actually bones. In a very famous incident a famous scientist was in a cave. He was just about o find the missing link when a huge boulder came rolling after him. He was nearly killed but luckily he had his huge bull whip with him.
    Stu Cranstence

  4. July 20th, 2010 at 18:18 | #4

    Hey, guys. That is NOT a fast growing mushroom. Really. Take my word for it. Mushrooms don’t steam.

    But I am really writing to suggest psychological help for Stu. The man is clearly over the edge. Have you thought of hiring a psychoanalyist to help with his addictions and NUMEROUS other mental health problems? I think a few hours on a shrink’s couch would do wonders for that poor boy.

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